Oh boy, I could write pages and pages on why I'm choosing a midwife. But I'm squeezing this post in before a morning stroll with my sweet son, so I'll try to keep it short. Perhaps I'll expound more later.
If I take my paragraphs of thoughts and condense them down to one sentence, it is this: I'm using a midwife because the philosophy and approach to care of midwives is patient-centered. Now, on the off-chance that a physician reads this and becomes outraged, I would like to clarify a bit. Medical doctors are not evil. This world as a whole, and my life in particular, would be less vibrant without the contributions of doctors. The philosophy of medicine, however, is disease-centered.
Pregnancy is not a disease. Labor and delivery are not disease processes. They are normal functions of health that increase the risk of certain diseases. If I were to develop a disease during my pregnancy I would seek the assistance of a physician. If my labor or delivery lead to an emergency, I will accept care from a doctor. But since I'm not sick, I'm not going to a doctor.
Those are all the rational reasons that make my voice carry a little more weight with those who disagree with me. Now for the raw thoughts that few dissenters respect: my labor and delivery were traumatic. There were many irritations during prenatal care, but let's skip to the fireworks. While I was in labor I received 7 needle sticks to place an unnecessary IV. My already extraordinary pain was increased when I was forced to lie down for a pelvic exam. When it was discovered that I was, in fact, dilated to 10cm like I said I was, people started yelling at me to not push. Once the doctor arrived, the commands changed to "push!" I delivered while lying on my back. My perineum ripped apart. While nurses were putting unnecessary antibiotics in my newborn's eyes the doctor shoved a needle into my vagina. She didn't ask me if I wanted the block. She didn't warn me. She just stabbed.
I don't ever want to go through that again.
Also, midwives have conversations like this.
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
Friday, May 6, 2011
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Bigger Baby Bump
I have written about quite a few bumps.
First there was the bump of Catholic Charities placing on the "Waiting List for the Waiting List" in October last year. Then last month there was the summary of two other bumps: the adoption fraud in January and the birthmom deciding to parent in March. It's been a wee bit bumpy. No amount of shock absorbers could have prepared us for this bump, though:
I'M PREGNANT!
Feel free to scream, shout, dance, etc. I personally fell to my knees and started sobbing, thanking God for allowing us to have another baby. I was so shocked that all creativity left my head. I called M and just yelled at him over the phone what you see highlighted above.
Here's some details: I'm 16 weeks pregnant, due October 2nd.
My ultrasound is scheduled for May 16th.
Yes, we will find out gender.
Yes, I will post the info here.
I am using a midwife for my prenatal care and for labor and delivery.
I'm planning on delivering at a birthcenter, but since N came so super duper fast,
we know there is a strong possibility that I'll have a home birth.
By the way, I highly recommend using a midwife who does home deliveries. Ours also does prenatal visits at our home. I haven't had to drive to an office. I haven't sat in a single waiting room. I haven't jumped up on an exam table. I get to listen to my sweet baby's heart beat from the comfort of my own couch. I am sure I will post more about the wonders of delivering with a midwife. The philosophy is so polar opposite medicines, so of course, the approach is going to be also.
If you haven't heard from me in a week, remind me to tell you about urine strips and protein drinks.
By the way, the reason I reference pregnancy as a bigger baby bump than our adoption complications isn't because a biological baby is a bigger deal than an adopted one. It's a bigger bump because I feel huge already. I had worked so hard to lose weight, and now it's flying right back on. Ugh. Oh well, I lost it once, I'll lose it again.
We do still think there is a baby for us to adopt. Now we're just super curious about the when, how, where, etc. Thanks for all your love and support!
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
First there was the bump of Catholic Charities placing on the "Waiting List for the Waiting List" in October last year. Then last month there was the summary of two other bumps: the adoption fraud in January and the birthmom deciding to parent in March. It's been a wee bit bumpy. No amount of shock absorbers could have prepared us for this bump, though:
I'M PREGNANT!
Feel free to scream, shout, dance, etc. I personally fell to my knees and started sobbing, thanking God for allowing us to have another baby. I was so shocked that all creativity left my head. I called M and just yelled at him over the phone what you see highlighted above.
Here's some details: I'm 16 weeks pregnant, due October 2nd.
My ultrasound is scheduled for May 16th.
Yes, we will find out gender.
Yes, I will post the info here.
I am using a midwife for my prenatal care and for labor and delivery.
I'm planning on delivering at a birthcenter, but since N came so super duper fast,
we know there is a strong possibility that I'll have a home birth.
By the way, I highly recommend using a midwife who does home deliveries. Ours also does prenatal visits at our home. I haven't had to drive to an office. I haven't sat in a single waiting room. I haven't jumped up on an exam table. I get to listen to my sweet baby's heart beat from the comfort of my own couch. I am sure I will post more about the wonders of delivering with a midwife. The philosophy is so polar opposite medicines, so of course, the approach is going to be also.
If you haven't heard from me in a week, remind me to tell you about urine strips and protein drinks.
By the way, the reason I reference pregnancy as a bigger baby bump than our adoption complications isn't because a biological baby is a bigger deal than an adopted one. It's a bigger bump because I feel huge already. I had worked so hard to lose weight, and now it's flying right back on. Ugh. Oh well, I lost it once, I'll lose it again.
We do still think there is a baby for us to adopt. Now we're just super curious about the when, how, where, etc. Thanks for all your love and support!
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Why I'm Smiling This Moment. . .
The sound of my son bouncing, jiving, dancing his way through the living room as he "steps in time" with Mary Poppins.
I know this is more a tweet than a blog post. But I don't tweet. So this'll have to do!
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
I know this is more a tweet than a blog post. But I don't tweet. So this'll have to do!
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
Friday, April 1, 2011
Another Bump
Our adoption journey continues to be very curious.
From November to January we were presented to four different birth moms. Each chose another family to parent her child.
In January we were presented to a birth mom who chose us to parent her baby girl. We later found out she's a fraud, thief, liar, all-around not-nice person.
In February we were presented to a birth mom who chose us to parent her baby boy. She gave birth to him last Friday. She decided not to place him in our home. She is going to parent him herself.
I don't think all these adoption losses are a coincidence. I'm just a bit curious on what is happening in the heavenlies.
In hind site it seems the loss of the little girl in January may in part have been to help capture a person who was devastating families. She is currently wearing a striped outfit in a small, uncozy room as she waits for her trial.
I have no idea why we lost the little boy last week. I will say that our hearts are filled with peace, though. I think our friends and family are having a harder time understanding why we keep experiencing so much loss.
Now that life has turned out so very differently than I anticipated, I'm looking forward with great expectation. I have no idea what to expect or even hope for.
Through it all, God is good to us. Jesus is both tender and strong enough to guard our hearts.
I'll keep you posted. . .
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
From November to January we were presented to four different birth moms. Each chose another family to parent her child.
In January we were presented to a birth mom who chose us to parent her baby girl. We later found out she's a fraud, thief, liar, all-around not-nice person.
In February we were presented to a birth mom who chose us to parent her baby boy. She gave birth to him last Friday. She decided not to place him in our home. She is going to parent him herself.
I don't think all these adoption losses are a coincidence. I'm just a bit curious on what is happening in the heavenlies.
In hind site it seems the loss of the little girl in January may in part have been to help capture a person who was devastating families. She is currently wearing a striped outfit in a small, uncozy room as she waits for her trial.
I have no idea why we lost the little boy last week. I will say that our hearts are filled with peace, though. I think our friends and family are having a harder time understanding why we keep experiencing so much loss.
Now that life has turned out so very differently than I anticipated, I'm looking forward with great expectation. I have no idea what to expect or even hope for.
Through it all, God is good to us. Jesus is both tender and strong enough to guard our hearts.
I'll keep you posted. . .
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
News
Yay!
Ugh.
The thrill of justice, the agony of publicity.
The woman who defrauded us a few months ago has been arrested. We were in a rather large group of people that she maliciously attacked. So large, in fact, that she will be brought up on federal charges.
This post will be annoyingly short and devoid of information. I am currently working on my Victim Impact Statement. So I need to focus. I also want to make sure nothing jeopardizes her being severely punished. I will give more info later, if I take too long you can try nagging me. Though it's never worked before, it just might this time.
; )
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
Ugh.
The thrill of justice, the agony of publicity.
The woman who defrauded us a few months ago has been arrested. We were in a rather large group of people that she maliciously attacked. So large, in fact, that she will be brought up on federal charges.
This post will be annoyingly short and devoid of information. I am currently working on my Victim Impact Statement. So I need to focus. I also want to make sure nothing jeopardizes her being severely punished. I will give more info later, if I take too long you can try nagging me. Though it's never worked before, it just might this time.
; )
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Happy Birthday!
Yesterday our sweet son turned three years old! Here is an overview of the day:
Waking to balloons and a "Happy Birthday" serenade.
Breakfast of a smiley-faced chocolate chip pancake and a free muffin
Painting
Sliding, Climbing, Jumping
A favorite dinner: spaghetti and meatballs!
We love you, sweet boy!
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copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
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copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
Friday, March 11, 2011
Insert Creative Title Here
Here is an update. For some reason all creativity has left my head right now. So here are some facts for ya:
Our meeting went really well. It wasn't as effortless as our meeting with the first birth mom. But in hind site, that's because the first woman wasn't facing a massive loss in her life.
I spent about an hour and a half with Amanda. M was there for the first hour, but then had to leave for work. I'm really glad we met because we were able to get more information about her history. She really didn't write anything down at the agency because she wants it to be a closed adoption. She was afraid if she gave too much information our son would find her in later years. But the extra information she gave us verbally will help our son have a better idea of his beginnings before he was ours.
We met with our agency yesterday to sign final paperwork with them. We'll meet with our attorney next Wednesday to get as much paperwork done before the birth as possible. So now we're just waiting for the birth. Amanda wants to be induced, but her doctor won't even consider it before she is 38 weeks. She'll be 38 weeks on March 26th. So I'm expecting a baby in late March. Woo hoo!
In (somewhat) unrelated news: I got an email from the social worker at the previous agency. She said a detective would like to speak with me to get information so they can make a case against the previous "birth mom." So I have an appointment with him next Monday. I am so glad that steps are being taken to keep her from hurting any more families.
Have a sunny weekend!
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
Our meeting went really well. It wasn't as effortless as our meeting with the first birth mom. But in hind site, that's because the first woman wasn't facing a massive loss in her life.
I spent about an hour and a half with Amanda. M was there for the first hour, but then had to leave for work. I'm really glad we met because we were able to get more information about her history. She really didn't write anything down at the agency because she wants it to be a closed adoption. She was afraid if she gave too much information our son would find her in later years. But the extra information she gave us verbally will help our son have a better idea of his beginnings before he was ours.
We met with our agency yesterday to sign final paperwork with them. We'll meet with our attorney next Wednesday to get as much paperwork done before the birth as possible. So now we're just waiting for the birth. Amanda wants to be induced, but her doctor won't even consider it before she is 38 weeks. She'll be 38 weeks on March 26th. So I'm expecting a baby in late March. Woo hoo!
In (somewhat) unrelated news: I got an email from the social worker at the previous agency. She said a detective would like to speak with me to get information so they can make a case against the previous "birth mom." So I have an appointment with him next Monday. I am so glad that steps are being taken to keep her from hurting any more families.
Have a sunny weekend!
copyright (c) Elizabeth, Bug's Beef. All rights reserved.
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